Fier Thy Words

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Some Fun With Helen Keller

3/11/08

I came to realize that I’m not having nearly as much fun on my blog as I had wanted to. Last week, I was browsing the good old world wide web and came across something I couldn’t resist turning into a post.

I was at my placement school with some time to kill, and a story online popped up which was all about the discovery of a 120 year old picture of Helen Keller.

helen-keller.jpg

Helen (left) is pictured with Anne Sullivan, her teacher.

Now this will undoubtedly be one of my ‘racier’ blog posts because I can’t come up with any rightful justification for throwing down some Heller Keller jokes other than to say they are always entertaining, and pretty damn funny.

I did some rummaging online and found some of the funnier Helen Keller jokes I could find, and so with all respect to Helen, deaf, dumb and blind people everywhere, here they are…

(it’s too bad Helen herself wasn’t around long enough to hear these……..)

….(wait)

————————————————————————————————–

-Why did Helen Keller’s dog kill itself?

…you would too if you’re name was lllllllllllllllllllluuuuuaaaaaaaahhhhhh

—————————————————————————————————

-Did you ever see how big Helen Keller’s backyard was?

…neither did she

—————————————————————————————————

-How did Helen Keller’s parents punish her?

…they left the plunger in the toilet

*or*

…they rearranged her furniture

(take your pick)

————————————————————————————————–

-How did Helen Keller burn her face?

…she answered the iron

————————————————————————————————–

-not so much a joke but more of a song (use your imagination to pick up the audio at the end…)

“Helen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it MMMMMMMMMAAAAHHHHHHUUUUUHHHH

——————————————————————————————————-

-How can you get Helen Keller to keep a secret?

…oven mitts

——————————————————————————————————-

and last but not least….(and the most inappropriate…)

Why does Helen Keller masturbate with only one hand?

…so she can moan with the other

——————————————————————————————————–

….and with that, I put my deposit down on a permanent room in hell

…worth it

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March 11, 2008 - Posted by | Uncategorized

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